Ask Coach: How Do I Help My Kids or Family Members Improve Their Mindsets?


Occasionally I will post frequently asked questions and my quick answers. These posts will be tagged “ask coach”, so you can find them easily.

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Question: How do I help my kids, or my family members understand the power of their minds? Is there anything I can do or say?

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Quick Answer: No, I do not have kids of my own, but I regularly think about the best ways to help others appreciate the importance of mentality. We can continue to explain the value of our thoughts, attitudes and emotions…instead of just telling others what to do (or what not to do). Helping others understand “why” and giving them examples can be very beneficial. If you’re interested in helping your family members, or friends understand the power of their minds, here are my 3 basic suggestions and some tips

  • Be an example. I’m a big believer that talking can only get us so far. We can make a greater influence on people with our actions/behaviors. Show your kids, or family members how you stay balanced, enthusiastic, optimistic, resilient, adaptable, calm, patient, open to coaching, and focused on your goals.  Inspire them, and work through challenges with them so they can see your effort and progress.
  • Ask them questions. Help the individual begin to build awareness and process themselves. Questions show your interest and they also allow the person to really analyze their own mindset. I think when you’re talking to kids/youth this is especially important.
    • “What were the 3 best parts of your day, or practice, or game?”
    • “What is 1 thing you learned from that tough situation?”
    • “How does that make you feel?”
    • “What words best describe you or who you want to be?”
    • “What do you really want to accomplish?”
    • “What can you help others with today?”
    • “Why is it important to stay positive and to speak kind words to yourself and others?”
    • “What thoughts can you have that help you calm down?”
  • Suggest books, movies, websites, articles, coaches, experiences that talk about the power of a positive, strong mentality. Maybe you can read books together, or you can go on a trip together. You could share websites, or social media links with others who are interested and make it a priority to share inspiring, helpful information instead of gossip or negativity. These mentality WOD posts are all about improving your mindset for daily life (and have nothing to do with CrossFit) – share away!
  • Give feedback on effort. Continue to acknowledge and praise the process over the results/outcomes. Talk about strategy, goal-setting, being creative, and about what that person did mentally to be successful

Always let people who you care about know that you support and love them. Check out these posts which may help

“2 Tips For Better Communication”

“Be An Effective Leader”

“One of The Best Ways To Make Connections” 

Did this help you? Is there something else you would suggest? Comment below.


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